We're Here For You

The Role Of Men In Ending Male Violence Towards Women

Saturday, I went to the Peace March in Richmond, an action organized by Kiki Poe, and Elecia Holland in support of the Richmond High School student who was gang-raped by 10 boys/men, while approximately 20 others watched, took photos, mocked, and encouraged the rapists. I went because of course, I want to show solidarity with the young woman, with ALL women, but I also wanted to see what the conversation was going to be about, and then maybe put my own two cents in to make sure it at least included getting men to take responsibility. 

About two hundred people showed up, frustratingly, only a small handful were actually from Richmond, the rest were from Oakland, and surrounding areas. I was, however, excited to see a few men with their children, and some young men (Dennis Kim from Youth Speaks) saying things which other men/boys really need to hear.

As usual though, there was some defensiveness. A man felt it necessary to express to me, that he felt it was divisive of me to call men out on rape culture, to hold men specifically accountable for male violence against women. I stood there talking with/listening to him for about 20 minutes, while he explained that mothers of the boys who don't have male role models are responsible too, that they need to make better choices, etc. He feels strongly that the conversation should not just be on what men can do, but what women can do as well. I told him that to a certain degree I agree that women can make better choices, we can ALL make better choices, but when violence against women is the topic of conversation, EVERYONE has been and continues to talk incessantly about the role women can play in male violence against women, including other women, men, the media, women's advocate groups and organizations, etc. I told him that the larger focus has been and continues to be on what women can do, when it should be on what men can and will do. He was defensive, he sees his participation in the march as proof that he's not a rapist, so we don't really need to be calling him out. This is not an uncommon response. Men do NOT want to see themselves as part of the problem, they don't want to see that they DO benefit from the violent, and brutal actions of their brothers, much the same way many, many white folks will get defensive when the issue of white privilege comes up. This guy absolutely did not want to be considered part of the group which terrorizes women and children, I can understand that, BUT until these men who see themselves as allies, yet don't do the simple (however painful) task of owning that they benefit from the violent oppression of women, they can't really be allies at all, in fact, because all their defensiveness does is drain us, and distract from the real issue, they are actually helping their brothers, they are making an active contribution to the culture of rape. 

Another example of defensiveness came when a photo of me holding a sign which reads RAPE is a Men's Issue, was posted on facebook, and the only thing some guy had to say about it was "men are raped all the time." My response was this "1 in 6 women/girls are raped/sexually assaulted. 1 in 33 men/boys are raped/sexually assaulted. 99% of rapes/sexual assaults are perpetrated by men. Rape is not a women's issue, by and large, we do not make the choice to rape, men do, ergo, rape (and male violence against women) is a men's issue." He, like many men (as well as the many women who care about the men in their lives) just doesn't want to see that men rape women so often that there is actually a culture of rape, that women have had to developed coping skills (which do not prevent male violence, they just lesson the odds of being the ones attacked), not only to deal with the reality of being preyed upon, but to deal with our fear around it. And he sure doesn't want to own that he is part of the group who has created this rape culture. Again, I get that it is painful to be on the same team as those who perpetrate violence towards women and children, but no amount of blaming the other guy, or disassociating himself from those "other" guys, is gonna get him off that team, there is only one way to NOT be on that team, and that is to stop/prevent male violence towards women. 

I don't hate men, there are many ways to see evidence of this, I don't rape men, I don't beat them, I don't use degrading language about them, I don't dehumanize them, I don't allow others to use degrading or dehumanizing language about them in my presence, I don't kidnap them, I don't murder them, I don't deny them equal pay, equal access to health care, education, or employment opportunities, I don't stalk them, I don't pressure them for sex, I don't engage in advertising campaigns about what their bodies should and should not look like, which involves a standard nearly impossible to meet without the use of starvation, surgery, and many artificial methods, and the list goes on. Despite this, when I, or pretty much any woman speaks out about the role men play in male violence towards women, and the role they must play to end/prevent that violence, the defensiveness becomes deafening, and then the next thing that happens is that that show-stopping term "man-hater" comes out. This is what so often stops the conversation, especially if the woman speaking is a lesbian, but it is just another distraction from the real issue, and the guy throwing it out there is actively engaged in shutting down the conversation, which means he is actually helping his brothers (those other guys, the ones who rape, etc) out, 'cos if I'm a man-hater then he/men is/are excused from listening to me, or any woman who expects men to step up and end/prevent male violence towards women. No, I don't hate men, but can most men, by their actions, say that they don't hate me/women?

What I say to women is, don't allow this to happen, don't allow yourselves to be distracted from holding men responsible, don't rush to the defense of the men/boys in your lives, when the role of men in male violence is talked about. First of all, holding them responsible, and accountable is not an attack on them, and second they don't need your help, most of them are already defending themselves. 

To men, I say to hell with opening women's doors or helping them put on their coats, we can do these things for ourselves, quite easily. If you really want to do something to show a woman she is special to you, and that you are a man of worth, then organize actions against male violence, get active in getting other men to help stop/prevent violence, do whatever you can to help make this a safer world for her. Take your children to actions and activities where the focus is ending male violence, with as much enthusiasm, and consistency as you have when taking them to monster truck rallies, football games, fishing, etc. Educate yourselves, and your children in recognizing the hatred of women in your daily lives, and do everything you can to replace it with respect for ALL human beings, regardless of gender, sexual orientation, ethnic, class, or religious background. And when, as with JD, or the high school student, women ARE attacked, do all that you can to support the woman who was hurt, donate your money/time, and get your male peers to donate theirs (99% of the money raised for JD has come from women, the ones who can least afford the money, where are all the men who say they care?). Do it loudly, and proudly, every day in front of your children, and then they and others will know you for being a decent human being, as well as how to be decent human beings themselves. Do this, and you will have what seems to be profoundly absent in men today...honor. The role of men in ending male violence towards women, MUST be proactive, it must be fierce, and it must be consistent, or nothing will change.

There is now a way to make automatic monthly payments of $10/month by clicking on the subscribe button, it takes two minutes tops to do. If you'd like to have a larger or smaller amount set up, then please let me know at tallonsong@aol.com. : )

Thank-you to all who are fighting this brutal war against women, thank-you for helping to support JD, your courage and compassion are deeply appreciated, and much admired.

When People Say Community, What It Really Boils Down To Is...WOMEN

I went to the vigil last night for the Richmond High School Student who was gang-raped by approximately 10 men and boys, while about 15-20 others watched and did nothing. I was hoping to see people fed up with what has been going on, not just in that one particular city, but the whole world over. Women are systematically terrorized with rape, assault, murder, exploitation, we are denied equal access to healthcare, education, as well as equal pay for the work that we do. The violence that the young high school student endured is a symptom of the hatred of women which permeates our society, I was hoping to see a lot of people who recognize this, and who have the interest in doing what it takes to stop it. There were some signs that read, "Don't Blame the Victim", etc. and there were a few words about changing what it means to be female and male, but most of what I heard from the mayor, from the director of Community Violence Solutions, councilmen, etc. all just seemed like empty words, meant more to further their careers, than to find a way to stop/end violence towards women. There was a lot of defensive talk, about how the city of Richmond or certain cultures are getting a bad rap, about how that kind of violence ISN'T normal for Richmond, but they never did call it for what it was, male violence against women. They talked about what the community can do, getting the community together, a stronger community, etc. Over and over again, I heard the word community, but don't we know that when the media is gone, when there is no longer an audience, don't we know that it is the WOMEN who do the work of supporting, of trying to figure out once again, a way to feel safe? Don't we know that what is really meant by community is that we women will be left holding the bag, as usual? We do the best we can, we come up with ideas, rules or guidelines, like making sure we aren't alone at night, like making sure we don't drink too much, or that we don't talk to men we don't know, etc. There were even some students role playing just those things for the crowd, but again, we are looking to women to stop the violence, when it is the men who perpetrate it, so it must be the men who stop it. 

We are encouraged to take classes to defend ourselves, one of the things we are told is that men who prey on women, aren't looking for a fight, they are looking for someone they can easily dominate, and if we have taken self-defense classes, if we move, and inhabit our bodies in such a way that signals our willingness to fight, the predator will pass us by, moving on to someone else, but that someone else is another woman! Now I'm not saying don't take the classes, I'm not saying don't do whatever you can to lower the odds of being attacked, I'm saying that if we think that any ways in which we alter our behavior, make us safe, we are making ourselves that much more vulnerable because we are no longer focusing our attention on getting men to stop violence against us, to alter THEIR behavior. 

There was a large turn out, mostly high school students, media, and those folks wanting a platform for their political interests. Most of the students weren't even listening, and engaged in making fun of whomever was on the stage at the moment, including their fellow students. I heard many male students making jokes about violence towards women, even mocking the sentence "violence against women". And the most poignant moment for me was when as I was leaving, I saw the school's football team on the field adjacent to the field where the "healing gathering" was taking place, practicing football. They could see the gathering, they could hear it, in fact, the sound system was so loud that it looked like it was interfering with the coach's ability to be heard by the players. Why weren't they at the vigil instead, why didn't their coach, and EVERY coach of ALL the organized sports in the school insist that their players be at the gathering? I believe it is because of the language we use, it is because we don't call it out as male violence towards women, instead, it is talked about as though it is only this one group or that one group who behaves in this way. But the reality is, is that EVERY man is involved, EVERY boy is involved. Even if they are not taking part in the savagery, if they are not actively fighting it as hard as any soldier at war, they are involved. If they make excuses, engage in side-stepping, or play politics, they are involved. If they benefit from the privilege of being male, they are involved, period. 

What I want to see is all women, everywhere, take the very heavy, and oppressive burden of the hatred of women, the violence that manifests from that hatred, and place it squarely on the shoulders of every man she knows. Ask them what they are doing to fight male violence towards women, ask them until they give you answers. I want to see every man who thinks he's such a badass, organize or participate in actions on behalf of ending violence against women, I want to see them donating their money to support the young Richmond High student, and JD. Ask the men in your lives to do these things, ask them to ask the other men in their lives to do these things. And then when you've asked every man you know, start DEMANDING, 'cos talk is nothing without action, and it is time for men to prove their love, not with jewelry, not with flowers, not with chocolates, but with concrete action towards getting men to change their behavior, their attitudes, and their beliefs about women.

I know there are some people who felt positive about the turnout, about some of the things that were said, but I am unwilling to deny who has been and continues to be responsible for most of the violence against women. This does not mean that I hate men, it means that we as women must admit to ourselves that we don't really trust them, and we must honor that there are billions of valid reasons why this is so, we must stop stuffing it down for the comfort of the men in our lives, so they don't have to own that they are part of a "brotherhood' which actively teaches and practices the hatred of women. For centuries, this hatred, and the violence that comes from it, has been and continues to be a wound to all women, it will not heal until there is no longer any violence against us. 

The time for change is NOW, anyone interested in organizing actions please contact me at: Tallonsong@aol.com. 

Asking The Right Questions About Male Violence Towards Women

I've been out of the country this last week, and I'm so very saddened, heartbroken really, to come home to over 400 emails with information and news about the 15 year old Richmond High School student, who was raped and beaten by 4-10 men and boys, while about 15-20 others watched and did nothing. In the emails, I hear fear, rage, sorrow, grief, bewilderment, frustration, anger, etc. I also hear the same questions again and again, "What are we, as women going to do to stop/prevent these rapes? What are we going to do to help support the young woman, what are we going to do to make sure our voices are heard around this, what are we going to do to protect ourselves, and each other?" Violence, and the threat of violence often surrounds us from a very early age. We are the targets of inappropriate and unwanted sexual attention from boys/men, even as little girls, no matter what our ethnic, religious, or class backgrounds are. We learn early what boys/men are capable of, and we spend a good part of our lives trying to figure out how to feel safe in this world, so it isn't surprising that we seem to take the approach that it is up to us to "fix" this problem. We've developed strategies to help protect ourselves, we have rules which we falsely believe will make us safe, but which usually only serve to help blame women who don't follow those rules, for being raped. When men are robbed, beaten, murdered, etc. we don't tell them they shouldn't have been intoxicated, or they shouldn't have been out when, and where they were, we put the blame/responsibility right where it belongs, with the perpetrator, so why is it that women are expected to behave differently, and then blamed when they are attacked? By and large, men are the ones who perpetrate these acts, but instead of taking men to task and making sure that they are educating themselves and each other, all too often violence against women is chalked up as women's issues. It doesn't make sense, ending/preventing violence against children isn't left for the children to figure out, so why is it that women are very nearly the sole source of support for victims of rape, as well as the prevention of it? This task should be entirely the responsibility of all men/boys, everywhere, especially given that boys/men learn early on that women's voices/ideas/values/perspectives are weak/irrational/illogical/emotional, and should be avoided. It is the opinion of the major movie producers, and publishing companies, that boys will not willingly watch/read a story with a female hero in it, or that is written by a woman (which is why J.K. Rowling, author of the Harry Potter books, used initials, rather than her name, and is likely why Harry is the protagonist, and not Hermione), so consequently, the heroes in movies, t.v. shows, and books are overwhelmingly boys/men. As I said, they are taught from an early age, NOT to value what women say/feel/think/etc. Boys/men aren't gonna listen to us, they aren't listening to us, but they do listen, they ARE listening to other men/boys. So MY question is not what women can do, but what are MEN going to do to stop/prevent rape? Every woman needs to ask this question of every man she knows, and keep asking until we get answers, until we get change.

As can be expected, JD is experiencing a great deal of grief, and re-traumatization since learning about what happened in RIchmond, she is troubled by the events, beyond what I can express, and she continues to need our help, so please make a donation, and ask everyone you know to help support as well.

That said, there is gonna be a vigil at Richmond High School, organized by the students, the details are as such:

Students at Richmond High are holding a "healing gathering" in regard to the gang rape of a 15-year-old girl on Oct. 24. The public is invited to attend. 

The event will include performances of spoken word, dance, and song. There will also be a candle light vigil once it begins to get dark. The theme color will be turquoise which represents sexual assault. 

Tuesday, November 3 at 3:30 - 5:30p.m. 
1250 23rd St. 
Richmond, CA 

The checks should be made out to "Richmond High School Student Fund. On the memo line, write "Assault Victim Fund." 

Also there is a Peace March happening on Saturday, if you can't make it tonight.

Come To What Is Sure To Be The Best Show Yet!

Stronger Together- Remix 

The Space (at the Laurel Jujitsu Building) 

4148 MacArthur Blvd. Oakland 

Doors open at 7:30, show starts at 8PM 

$10-$100 donation

Well Olivia Travel has stepped up again in massive support of JD, donating a stay for two from Nov. 14- Nov. 21, 2009, at the Vallarta Palace Resort!!

The trip includes 7 nights’ accommodations, evening entertainment, all meals, round-trip transfers to/from airport, all soft drinks, most alcoholic beverages, and most activities. Amenities include in-room Jacuzzi tubs, marble bathrooms with separate shower; turn down service, liquor dispenser, mini bar (containing sodas, bottled water and domestic beer), individually-controlled A/C, ceiling fan, satellite TV, purified water, Farouk® bath amenities, bathrobes, slippers, digital safe, coffee maker, direct dial phone, alarm clock, hairdryer, iron, ironing board. Every room has a terrace, deluxe balcony or French balcony. *The resort is accessible.

The following items are not included: airfare, traveler insurance, excursions, incidentals (boutique/spa services), champagne and certain designated alcohols. There is a charge of $169 per person for taxes and gratuities. 

Here’s a link to the trip: http://www.olivia.com/Travel/Trips_vallarta-about.aspx

I'm also VERY happy to say that The Space in Oakland has stepped up and donated the venue for the next fundraiser! I can't thank them enough, but you can help me by checking them out, and supporting their events! We are in desperate need of donated items/services, so if you have a business or work for a company, please ask them for their support in donating gift certificates, etc. So far the raffle ticket sales are the greatest source of funds, so please give us a hand, we REALLY need it. For large donations, I'm happy to list your business as a sponsor in the promotions for the event. : ) 

I hope you can make it to the show, it's gonna be AWESOME, but if you can't PLEASE donate here anyway, even if it's just a small amount, every little bit makes a great difference, and of course, please pass on the link to this website, so that others can contribute as well. 

For the Stronger Together-Remix there will be performances by: 

Rebecca Riots  

Inflight Nymphs  

Irina Rivkin

*This is event is scent-free and accessible. 

WHAT IS THE SPACE? A new community-based art and music center in the Laurel District of Oakland. Our venue features music concerts; art shows; films; classes in language, dance, and movement; chorus singing; and more. The local neighborhood is welcoming and coming to life with new restaurants, a farmers market, boutiques, crafts events, and music fairs. We produce events, and you can rent it for yours. 

WHAT WE HAVE: A beautiful, warm, airy venue with 1,000 square feet of performance/meeting/rehearsal space, art gallery wall space, chairs, tables, all wooden sprung floor (good for dancers), and completely wheelchair accessible. Parking in the residential neighborhood is free and plentiful, and it's on the 57 bus line. Landlord is a lesbian and very supportive of our efforts. 

WHAT IS NEEDED? Your help to keep the dream going - the possibilities are enticing and almost endless. If you are interested in volunteering 2 -10 hours a week to keep the venue going, read on. 

JOB AREAS INCLUDE, but not limited to: music production team, cultural events coordination, crafts fair coordination, rental management, facility management, publicity & promotion, community liaison, fiscal development, clerical and internet communication. We need both leaders and assistants. 

MEETING ON HOW TO GET INVOLVED *This coming Saturday* Oct 10th, 2009, 10:30 AM The Space (at Laurel Jujitsu), 4148 MacArthur Blvd. (between Maybelle and 39th Ave. near High St.) Oakland, CA 94619 Refreshments, coffee, tea will be served Parking around the corner in the residential area is free CONTACT US: RSVP to thespaceoakland@gmail.com or 510-436-4277 We want participation from people of all ages, races, cultures, and sexual/gender orientations.

Sexy People Donate!

Thank-you for visiting this site, and for your care and concern for JD. There are hundreds of hits on this website a day, but the same can't be said for donations. If each of you visiting here would donate just $5 it would make a huge difference. Maybe you could forego a coupla coffee drinks or rent a dvd instead of going to the cinema, your small sacrifice, along with those same small sacrifices from others pooled together can and would make such a difference to JD and her family. Please don't make the assumption that someone else will pick up the slack, 'cos it isn't happening, donations are very few, and much smaller now. Your contribution will come back to you, in gratitude, in a sense of community, and trust that your community would do the very same for you or someone you loved. Plus, contributing to another's welfare automatically boosts yer intelligence and sex appeal, ten-fold, heh.

Again, please pass the link to this page around so others can help as well.

My profoundest thanks and gratitude,

tallon

I wanna thank everyone who showed up to the Stronger Together event on Friday, we raised $730 for JD! It was a smaller crowd, but we still did a pretty damn good job! Thank-you to all the performers, Rebecca Crump, Carrie Gerendasy, Irina Rivkin, Marca Cassity, and Blair Hansen, y'all were great. Thank-you as well to the interpreters Mark and Annie, you did a fabulous job, and you were good sports whilst I indulged my adolescent humor and had you interpreting dirty words, heh. 

From the beginning, my approach to raising funds for JD, has been to send out a general request for assistance, I don't tend to go to any one person and ask, (excepting when it comes to performers) preferring to create a space where people feel good about coming forward on their own. This way, no one feels cornered or obligated to do something they aren't able to do, and it is also an attempt to make sure that the weight of the burden does not fall on a small group of people, but is dispersed throughout so that it is manageable for all. I'm finding that as time goes by, I am needing to approach people about spaces, and other help. It can be frustrating, especially when they don't even respond, but I never had to approach Irina Rivkin, she came to me in January and asked if I would co-produce an event to benefit JD, and she has consistently offered up any help she can give since, so I would like to say a VERY special thank-you to her for that. Irina, I'm proud to work with you on these events, I'm proud to be in the same community with you, and I'm proud to call you my friend. I know I'm a better person for knowing you, so many thanks for that as well. 

To the people who show up, there is more gratitude in my heart than I can express, but I thank you for coming to the events and supporting JD. I know you have many options when it comes to where you spend your money, so I greatly appreciate that you choose to put your money where your community is. That said, the donations are fewer and much smaller, the audience at the shows are also getting smaller, but JD is still not able to work, so I'm gonna keep trying to motivate y'all to help. The best way I know to do that at this point is to wrangle some really good talent together to put on a show you will wanna see, and again with Irina's help, that's what's gonna happen on October 23rd. Rebecca Riots (http://www.myspace.com/rebeccariotsmusic) will be performing as will Inflight Nymphs (www.myspace.com/inflightnymphs), and Irina Rivkin (www.rosestmusic.com), so please mark yer calendars, 'cos this is gonna be a MAJOR treat for everyone who shows up. I'm still looking for a space/venue (preferably accessible), and it must be donated, discounts, low cost doesn't work, I don't have the money to come out of pocket any more than I have. The other thing that has been very effective in helping to raise money is through the raffling of donated items and services, so if you have 'em, we need 'em, please lemme know. Again, I ask that you pass along the link to EVERYONE (Queer, straight, boy, girl, whatever) you know, and ask them to do the same, don't make the decision for them that they wouldn't/couldn't help, or that they won't want to receive the link, even if they can't donate, they may be willing to pass it on to their friends, some of whom can and would, you never know, and if they don't, all they have to do is delete the email, no harm done. http://tatasworld.typepad.com/were_here_for_you/ 

UPDATE: The preliminary hearings that were supposed to take place today have been cancelled (don't have a new date yet) and it appears that the minor involved may be tried as an adult. It is also looking as though JD may not be attending those hearings, she is struggling right now, so it is understandable if she were to decide not to be involved in any of the court proceedings, I support whatever decision she makes on it, and I hope y'all will too. I can't imagine going through what she went through, being beaten and then gang-raped for being a lesbian, and then to sit in the same room with them, breathing the same air, with their families there, knowing that the goal for them is to get as light a sentence as possible, for them to get out, and get as far away from what happened as they can, to get on with their lives, which may or may not involve assaulting other women. It is 100% understandable that she wouldn't want to be there for that, JD's goals right now are to continue to have a roof over her head, food on the table, etc., to manage the debilitating migraines which hit her throughout the day and night, and trying to alleviate neck and back pain, as well. She's working on being able to go to work at some point so she can contribute to the well being and happiness of her daughter and partner. Her goals are to feel less anxious about going outside of her apartment, and being among other people, to be able to sleep without having nightmares, to feel like she even has a life again. If it is her decision not to take part in the trials, then I hope our community will show up in her stead, to be present as a force and represent her voice, and the voice of our entire community. 

On behalf of JD, and her family, I thank you for your help, support and well wishes. 

tallon

The Latest Fundraiser, Save The Date!!

I'm happy to say that Irina Rivkin and I have teamed up again in effort to raise money to help JD and her family, please join us for what is sure to be a fantastic show, with a very important purpose. There will be great performances as well as a raffle with awesome prizes, so bring yerselves, and yer friends, and help us support our little sister JD! 

The Winner of the Olivia Halloween Caribbean Cruise For Two is not able to go, which means we're raffling it again this coming Friday, so bring yer wallets, and maybe you and yer sweetie/or a pal, or just you, will be going on a cruise next month! 

If you have items/serivces which we can raffle, they are MOST welcome! If you donate something valued at $100+, we will promote your business in promotions for the Sept. 25th, and October 23rd events.

Of course we'd love to see you at the show, but if you are unable to make it, please, PLEASE donate here, pass this link around to yer family and friends, and ask them to donate as well, we are profoundly grateful! 

*ASL interpreter available

**This a scent-free event

For more info on the artists:

Blair Hansen: acoustic indie folk-rock 

www.blairhansen.com

Marca Cassity: folk-rock hurricane www.marcacassitymusic.com

Irina Rivkin: live-looping OutMusic Awardee www.sonicbids.com/irinarivkin,  

plus special guests Carrie Gerendasy and Rebecca Crump.

Thank You And We Still Have a Way To Go

JD's grateful, and she continues to be amazed at our community's willingness to help her and her family. But I can see the stress in her face when we talk about getting the rent paid. I want to say with nothing but confidence, "don't worry about the rent, it will be paid" but that is hard, 'cos everyone is struggling right now, and people have lost interest, and even though I will have more fundraisers, the amount that gets raised each time, is less and less. 

We talk about the trials that are coming up, and every time, I am surprised to see the fierce determination in her eyes, and in the set of her jaw, to do everything she can to see that the men who attacked her, get what they deserve. I guess my surprise comes from the fact that she's been losing weight, and since she didn't have much to spare, it makes her seem more fragile, so I keep expecting that she'll give up. She doesn't like to go out much, but when she does, I've noticed that she piles on several layers of clothing no matter how hot it is, as if she is trying to be invisible, but when it comes to the cases, she continues to insist on being seen, and heard. I guess the amazement goes both ways. 

Again, I wanna thank everyone who helped at Come Together, but we are far short of what's needed ($5,000) to cover 6 months of rent for JD. So please continue to pass along the link to this page and ask everyone you know to contribute, I know we can do this! 

Unfortunately, the winner of the cruise is unable to go, so she gave it back to me to sell or try to auction it off, in order to raise more money for JD. So treat yourself and your loved one or give it to a couple of your deserving friends as a gift, it's a great thing for a great cause!

I would like to get at least one month rent for JD (which is $1,095) if I can. The ship departs from Tampa, FL on October 25 – November 1, 2009, and includes all meals, 24 hour room service, a large outside stateroom with a window, a queen bed, which converts to two twins, a sitting area, bath/shower, etc. Flights to/from Tampa, alcoholic beverages, soda, excursions are an outside cost factor. The value of the cruise is over $5,000, so if anyone offers to buy it outright, and is anywhere near that number, I will sell it, but until then, I will take bids on it here and on facebook (in the comments section of my profile- Tallon Nunez) until Sept. 1st. You can post your bid as a comment to this post, and I will enter any bids from facebook here in the comments section as well. 

What a great way to celebrate Halloween – on a trip with 1,250 lesbians! This cruise starts in Tampa, FL and we’re headed to Key West, Belize, Cozumel and Guatemala. We’ll even be in Key West for Fantasy Fest, their amazing Halloween festival! 

Great Olivia music and comedy will keep you dancing and laughing throughout the trip. Olivia’s fantastic lineup includes: Leisha Hailey (yes, Alice from the L Word), Vickie Shaw, Julie Goldman, Elvira Kurt, Vicci Martinez, Von Iva, The Wau Wau Sisters, Carlease, Viki Dee, and Halcyon. And, if that isn’t enough, Good Vibrations is also setting sail with us to spice up your Halloween with some special tricks and treats. Be sure to pack for Halloween, because one lucky person will win a $1000 prize in our costume contest.

http://www.olivia.com/Travel/Trips_Caribbean_Halloween.aspx

Many, many thanks!

Come Together Thanks YOU!

From the very bottom, to the very top of my heart, I wanna thank everyone who helped, participated in, and showed up for Come Together! We raised $1,760 to help JD pay some rent, while she gears up and goes through what is sure to be a very painful and difficult time during the impending trials.

I can not express the very deep gratitude I feel for the generosity and kindness shown by Dawn Huston of El RIo. You are an amazing and wonderful woman, if you were a beautiful single femme, I'd marry you right now, heh. Seriously, your support is invaluable, and you are a totally awesome person, I feel lucky and honored to know you.

Olivia Travel stepped up, and came through when we needed them, for that they will always have my eternal gratitude. The amount of money raised was nowheres near the value of their donation but there can be no doubt that it made all the difference in the event. It makes me so happy to see companies who really get what community is about, and Olivia Travel totally gets it. Please show them some serious love, become a fan/friend and thank them for their help. If you are thinking about taking a vacay, or going on a trip, please give big consideration to Olivia Travel, they will take very good care of you. Thank you also to Courtney Hosmon, and Christina Ladany for your spirited and fun participation, you rocked!

To all the performers:

Inflight Nymphs

Bittersweet Trio

Emily Palen

Tonilyn Sideco

The Twilight Vixen Revue

Jai Jai Noire

The Buds Duo

Irina Rivkin

Carrie Gerendasy

You ALL did a wonderful job, everyone had a great time because of your efforts, your art, and talents, THANK-YOU!

To the volunteers:

Alyx Banyan

Joey Brite

Mkali Hashiki

Karen Wyant

Giant-sized hugs, and THANK-YOUS for your invaluable help. Joey, you did a fantastic job hustling those raffle tickets! Mkali, you were a top notch donation wrangler! Alyx, and Karen, well done on being the front line of the evening! 

Congratulations to Alyx for winning the Olivia cruise for two, it's not too late to take me, I'm just sayin', heh.

To all the contributors, thank you to all of you for your willingness to help support JD, it means more than I can ever say to see your generous spirits!

Also, a very special thank-you to all of you who keep coming to support JD, you are truly wonderful people, and I'm honored that you are a part of our community!

I will be organizing another fundraiser soon, the goal was to raise enough for 6 months of rent, that means at least another $5,000 to go, so if any of yuhs wants to get a jump on things and let me know how you'd like to help, contribute, etc. lemme know! : ) 

And if you wanna help meet the goal, please donate online, and gitcher friends to do so as well. : ) http://tatasworld.typepad.com/were_here_for_you/

much love,

tallon

Oliva Travel Sponsors Come Together Benefit!!!

Wanna know who really cares about our community? OLIVIA TRAVEL definitely does! Yes they have been giving us fabulous cruise opportunities for 20 years now, but they also give back when they are needed. I'm very happy, and very proud to announce that they have donated a cruise for two aboard Olivia’s Halloween Caribbean Cruise!!! www.olivia.com/Travel/Trips_Caribbean_Halloween.aspx

This is a really amazing contribution, and I can't say enough how much it means to see them stepping up and giving back to our community like this, it brings me to tears, happy tears, of course. : )

Follow the link for all the info on the event: http://www.facebook.com/event.php?eid=111024473171

So come out to Come Together 

This Thursday

August 13, 2009

door begins at 6, show starts at 6:30

El Rio 

3158 Mission St. S.F.

Come see the incredible performances, and get a chance to win an OLIVIA cruise, and some other really cool prizes, woot, woot!

See you there!